13 Reasons Why the Person didn’t Answer your Greeting (Awkward)

Why do some people don’t acknowledge your existence when you greet them? Here are my 13 reasons why your greeting was unanswered.

  1. The person has a lot in his or her mind that day.

Do not be disheartened. Maybe the individual was just worried and already got lost in his or her own thoughts to be bothered with.

Possible issues they are considering:

sick family member

financial difficulties

stressful relationships

  1. The person saw you but it didn’t register in his/her mind.

The individual might be daydreaming at that time. You might see their eyes looking or even staring at you but their minds are in a faraway place like:

  • Last movie they saw and how cute the character was
  • Dreaming of eating something delicious
  • Winning the lottery and what to do with it

Photo by Alexander Solodukhin

woman thinking with a book
Yes, I guess it was the BUTLER who did it!
  1. The person has limited vision or hearing.

They may not see you from afar or even heard your greeting. Greet them at arms-length just to be sure.

I will not see you from a distance so forgive me in advance if I don’t greet back. My friend once told me I have a serious face. Please bear with me. I am a work in progress in having a cheerful face. *giggling*

  1. They are snobbish.

Some believe that they are better than the rest of humanity. They do not want to mingle with human beings they consider inferior.

Photo by Saúl Venegas

eyeglasses on the sand
I can’t find my eyeglasses!Someone said hi and I don’t know who it was!
  1. The person forgot who you are.

Ouch. Sometimes, you meet interesting people at parties and other social events. When you try to greet them at a random place, they might be deliberating in their minds where they met you. If they see you as a stranger, it might be a wake-up call to improve your social skills.

  1. The person just doesn’t like you.

You may encounter people who totally hate your guts. You are not doing anything wrong to them and yet every cell of their being is disgusted by your mere presence. Strolling in their space makes them cringe.

Photo by Bill Jones, Jr.

WHO ARE YOU?(brain working overtime)
  1. The person is shy.

Some individuals are anxious when meeting new people. What others take for granted like greeting someone, can be a huge deal for them. The chance to interact was lost because he/she was reluctant to respond.

  1. The individual was in a really awful mood.

Others may have a terrific poker face when angry. Some do not want people near them when they are furious because the closest person may become the poor victim of their wrath. They decided not to greet you.

Photo by Luke Braswell

woman in black
I am going to explode in 5…4…3…2… (seething inside)

 

  1. The person can’t think straight because of medication.

You are not in the mood to greet somebody when you feel numb, nauseous or dizzy. It is the last thing on your mind.

  1. Someone does not want to make a mistake.

Awkward moment: You said hello but realized the person was greeting somebody behind you.

Other people want to make sure they are the ones receiving the greeting not the ones near them. However, the opportunity was lost in a blink of an eye.

Photo by Eric Didier

woman looking
Did that man say hi to me or what?!Weird.

 

  1. The person just looks straight ahead.

They are not snooty. Some walk so fast, they don’t even have time to look left or right. The person was on a mission. You cannot bother him/her no matter what.

  1. The person’s height can affect their view.

I know someone who is 6’4 feet (193.04cm) in height and is a friendly guy. Sometimes he sees me and smiles, sometimes he doesn’t. My height is  5 feet (152.4cm)  so I usually get lost in a crowd of tall people.

One time I was in the shop and had to turn right in the corner but almost got my face flat on a guy’s broad chest. It was embarrassing for both of us because he had to dodge me. I could have bumped on him and landed on my bottom. *giggling again*

Photo by mauro mora

fast-paced crowd
I didn’t see you coming.

13.     Sad to say, maybe the reason is YOU.

Was your voice loud enough to be heard?

Where you too far to be recognized?

Do you tell every time each person your dramas in life?

Could the reason be your social skills? Do you stay near the walls every social event or continuously tap on your phone during parties? Your face can be forgotten in a gathering.

Does your body language show sadness, aloofness or even an arrogant aura?

Do you talk a lot to the point the listener is bored to death?

Sometimes, we need to focus on ourselves so we can have personal growth.

Photo by Andre Hunter

angry face
Ha! I bet my problem is worse than yours!

 

Give the man/woman the benefit of the doubt if they didn’t answer your gesture. Do not take it seriously. If they didn’t return your greeting and lovely smile, it’s okay. Yes, it might be awkward on your part but just keep smiling and saying hello to others. Friendships start that way.

I think that anybody that smiles automatically looks better. – Diane Lane

 

Photo by Vladislav Klapin

hello sign

 

 

 

 

Songs that will make you feel good, guaranteed!

One of these songs is bound to perk you up, make you feel alive, have FAITH and believe in yourself.  I play these songs especially when I want to feel good.

I included the songs I grew up with listening on the radio, cassette tapes and CDs. Presently, I appreciate some of the songs at Spotify app, Freegal music app, and YouTube. My apologies if the songs are not the latest ones. Enjoy the VIDEOS!

WOMEN RULE songs

When you hear these songs, it creates a feeling that YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH.

This list boosts your confidence. The main idea of most of the songs is even if the person committed a mistake, there is an option to move on, learn from the experience and come out a better version of oneself.

Due to possible copyright issues, I cannot write the lyrics of the songs that convey the main message. I could write the title of the song and the singer though.

  1. Fighter – Christina Aguilera
  2. Beautiful – Christina Aguilera
  3. Fight Song – Rachel Platten
  4. Brave – Sara Bareilles
  5. Roar -Katy Perry
  6. Firework – Katy Perry
  7. Part of me -Katy Perry
  8. Let it Go – Idina Menzel
  9. Stronger( What Doesn’t Kill You) – Kelly Clarkson
  10. Strong Enough – Cher
  11. R-E-S-P-E-C-T – Aretha Franklin
  12. Stronger – Britney Spears
  13. I Will Survive – Gloria Gaynor
  14. Titanium – David Guetta ft. Sia
  15. Girl on Fire – Alicia Keys

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CevxZvSJLk8

Official music video for Katy Perry’s “Roar” brought to you in Junglescope directed by Grady Hall & Mark Kudsi

Music video by Cher performing “Strong Enough”. ©1999 Warner Bros. Records.

Alicia Keys’ official music video for Girl On Fire

POSITIVE VIBES songs

Start the day right by listening to songs that brainwash you with positivity.

As a mum, there are times there are so many things inside your head that you have to PLAN, DECIDE AND OVERCOME.  The list will help you relax.

  1. Happy -Pharell Williams
  2. With a Smile – Eraserheads
  3. Undefeated – Daughtry
  4. Drag me Down – One Direction
  5. Walking on Sunshine – Katrina and the Waves
  6. Can’t Stop the Feeling – Justin Timberlake
  7. Tonight Again -Guy Sebastian
  8. Don’t Worry be Happy – Guy Sebastian
  9. Count on Me – Bruno Mars
  10. Shake it Off – Taylor Swift
  11. Beautiful Day – U2
  12. Ain’t No Mountain High Enough – Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell
  13. Don’t You Worry Bout a Thing – Tori Kelly
  14. I Gotta Feeling – Black Eyed Peas
  15. Feel this Moment – PitBull ft. Christina Aguilera
  16. Don’t Worry Be Happy – Bobby McFerrin
  17. Everything’s Gonna Be Alright – Bob Marley

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPUmE-tne5U

Official video of Katrina & The Waves performing Walking On Sunshine from the album Walking On Sunshine.

YouTube video by blaxter47 published on  June 16, 2006

PharellWilliamsVevo Published on January 8, 2014

If you want to FEEL COOL WHILE CLEANING THE HOUSE songs 

  1. Gonna Fly Now ( Rocky Theme Song)

Cleaning the house becomes awesome because the song takes you to the feeling of Rocky punching the air and jumping joyfully after conquering his doubts and fears.

  1. I Get Around  or Surfin  USA– The Beach Boys

Listening gives you the sensation of surfing at the beach while vacuuming.

  1. Staying Alive – The Bee Gees

As if you are wearing the coolest sunglasses while showing off your 70s wardrobe when this song is your background music.

  1. Uptown Funk – Mark Ronson ft. Bruno Mars

I like Bruno Mars. period.

  1. Man, I Feel Like a Woman – Shania Twain

It is a country song that celebrates You.

YouTube Video by RHINO Published on August 3, 2010

Stayin’ Alive” is a disco song by the group Bee Gees from the Saturday Night Fever motion picture soundtrack.

ShaniaTwainVevo Published on October 8, 2009

If you want to FEEL GOOD WHILE TRYING TO FINISH A TASK PLAYLIST

When it is that time when you feel sad for no reason or when the chores are overwhelming but you have to finish it and when your mind has to be awake, choose a song from the list.

  1. Shut Up and Dance – Walk the Moon
  2. I’m So Excited – The Pointer Sisters
  3. Let’s Get Ridiculous – Red Foo
  4. Born This Way – Lady Gaga
  5. What Makes You Beautiful – One Direction
  6. The Twist – Chubby Checker
  7. Eye of the Tiger – Survivor
  8. Dancing Queen – Abba
  9. Express Yourself – Madonna
  10. Girls Just Want to Have Fun – Cyndi Lauper
  11. Wake Me Up Before You Go – George Michael
  12. Foot Loose – Kenny Loggins
  13. Livin La Vida Loca – Ricky Martin
  14. On the Floor – Jennifer Lopez ft. Pitbull
  15. Geronimo – Sheppard
  16. Party Rock Anthem – LMFAO
  17. Gangnam Style – Psy
  18. Take on Me – a-Ha
  19. It’s Raining Men – Geri Halliwell
  20. Dancing in the Street – David Bowie and Mick Jagger

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eh8eb_ACLl8

YouTube video by easylyricsorg3609 Published on December 30, 2010

© 1974 Polar Music International AB Published by Universal/Union Songs AB

Music video by WALK THE MOON performing Shut Up and Dance. (C) 2014 RCA Records, a division of Sony Music Entertainment

If you are in the MOOD FOR LOUD MUSIC AND ROCKSTAR MODE while doing the Headbanging dance move (and vacuuming, dusting, washing…)

I didn’t focus on the lyrics of the songs in this playlist. Some of the lyrics don’t make sense at all. In spite of that, the songs will make you feel good if you want to hear electric guitars, loud drums, and powerful vocals. I don’t even agree with some of the lines of the songs but when I hear the music, it takes me back to my youth when I don’t care. *giggling*

  1. Feels Like Teen Spirit – Nirvana
  2. Grace Kelly – Mika
  3. Raise Your Glass – Pink
  4. Livin on a Prayer – Jon Bon Jovi
  5. It’s My Life – Jon Bon Jovi
  6. Don’t Stop Believin – Journey
  7. Under Pressure – Queen or Under Pressure – David Bowie or both
  8. Sweet Child of Mine – Guns and Roses
  9. Zombie – The Cranberries
  10. Bring Me to Life – Evanescence
  11. All the Small Things – Blink 182

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YoDh_gHDvkk

YouTube video by QueenHouse85 Published on Mar 19, 2013

Music video by Bon Jovi performing Livin’ On A Prayer. (C) 1986 The Island Def Jam Music Group

journeyVEVO Published on Oct 19, 2010 
Journey’s official live video for ‘Don’t Stop Believin” performed in Houston

If you want to AWAKEN the Sexy Diva in YOU ( Yes, you are sexy. You just need to be reminded.)

  1. She’s so high –Tal Bachman
  2. Venus – Shocking Blue
  3. Crazy in Love – Beyonce
  4. I Never Loved You Anyway – The Corrs
  5. Vogue – Madonna
  6. Can’t Get You Out of My Head – Kylie Minogue
  7. Don’t Cha – The Pussycat Dolls
  8. Just the Way You Are – Bruno Mars
  9. Only Girl (In the World) – Rihanna
  10. Oh, Pretty Woman – Roy Orbison
  11. She’s A Lady – Tom Jones
  12. (I’ve Had) The Time of My Life– Jennifer Warnes, Bill Medley
  13. I’m Every Woman – Whitney Houston

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPwtJ89jes4&list=RDYPwtJ89jes4

Official HD Promo Video for Kylie Minogue’s fantastic single ‘Can’t Get You Out Of My Head’. Published on Jan 23, 2015

© 2011 WMG. The official music video for ‘Just The Way You Are’ by Bruno Mars from doo-wops and hooligans -Directed by Ethan Lader Inspired by the artwork of Erika Iris Simmons

whitneyhoustonVEVO Published on Nov 14, 2009

 If you want to take it Slow but still uplifting SONGS

  1. Lazy Song by Bruno Mars
  2. Amazed by Lone Star
  3. Climb Every Mountain ( Sound of Music soundtrack)
  4. Hero by Mariah Carey
  5. Somewhere over the Rainbow – by Israel “IZ” Kamakawiwoʻole

 

If you prefer songs that inspire FAITH IN GOD when everything doesn’t make sense

  1. The Lord’s Prayer (Our Father) – by Johnny Mathis
  2. God Will Make a Way – Don Moen
  3. Shine Jesus Shine – Graham Kendrick
  4. Lead Me Lord – Gary Valenciano
  5. You Raise Me Up – Josh Groban
  6. Amazing Grace – Susan Doyle
  7. Lift Up Your Hands – Basil Valdez
  8. Give Thanks ( With A Grateful Heart) – Don Moen
  9. Take Me Out of the Dark -Gary Valenciano
  10. When You Believe – Whitney Houston ft. Mariah Carey
  11. I Will Follow Him – Sister Act 1 Movie Finale or I Will Follow Him – Peggy March

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rSWXf2Y4z0

DonMoenTV Published on Feb 14, 2016 

YouTube Video by TheGoddess461 Published on Apr 4, 2011

 YouTube video by vinzpaul747   Published on Jul 13, 2009

I hope that scanning through the lists, you may discover a song that will truly make you FEEL GOOD about yourself, the day you will face and about LIFE.  Have faith.

What are you waiting for? Search up the songs on YouTube, Google or even Spotify. Take care.

Share this post with someone who copes with stress through music.

Do Try and See What Happens

person on a lonely road

Did you try something because it is your choice or you have to? The consequences might be good or bad. The effects may be short-term or even a lifetime. Here are the 10 things I tried.

  1. I tried to say what was on my mind.

To say or not to say, that is the question. When you decide to express it, how you say it becomes important. I learned this the hard way.

  1. It feels so good to release what really is bothering you.
  2. You hurt someone close to you.
  3. You were able to correct someone’s assumption of you.
  4. Relationships become better or worse.
  5. You were able to say something that changed the way people think and behave.

No matter how good your intention is in stating it, if the delivery is too emotional, the communication is totally lost.  Both of you become defensive and listening with an open mind is impossible.

Photo by Michelle Phillips

Seriously… you said WHAT?!
  1. I tried to DIET and Exercise.

These are the two words every middle-aged mum will have to DO AND CONQUER.  Being a middle-aged mum, I know I am not getting any younger anymore and lifestyle changes are necessary.

Let us start with DIET. Articles I read stated that healthy eating means everything in moderation. You don’t have to starve or deprive yourself of food you really love. It is a healthy lifestyle that you can keep up without screaming at yourself that you had ENOUGH!

Photo by Markus Spiske

strawberry,raspberry and blueberry on a plate
Are you kidding me? Is this it?!

I posted on my blog an article about cravings. Craving for a comfort food during an emotional turmoil is a  weakness of many (including me). It really takes discipline to stop stress-eating.  I believe there is always a way. I am still in the process of finding the way.

There is a long list of benefits of exercise but remaining CONSISTENT in doing it is a struggle. I was able to do it and lost weight before my wedding. I gained it back after giving birth to three boys. Experts say do what you love and for me, dancing is one of them. Let’s see what happens in the future with this type of exercise. I SALUTE you if you can shed off the kilos permanently!

Photo by Chris Arock

woman touching her head
Mantra:  I can do this. No orders of cappuccino and a slice of cake.
  1. I tried to write a blog.

I have never taken a writing course or journalism but decided to try and start a blog.

The question WHAT IF is no longer in my head. This website is good for one year. I am writing to express my thoughts and feelings. Through this, I can

make someone happy,

let a reader ponder an idea,

share a concept or two and

even change me for the better.

I may not be the best writer but if I was able to touch someone’s life with the words I wrote, then I can say, I am glad I TRIED TO WRITE A BLOG. If I couldn’t maintain this website in the future, I can still say to myself, at least I became a mum blogger once in my lifetime! Thank you for reading.

Photo by Parker Byrd

typing on a laptop
Learning blogging as I go along.

 

  1. I tried to be a POSITIVE THINKER.

My line of thought was something might go wrong. I am Mrs. Worrier.

However, my thinking changed when I read the book The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. It never occurred to me that one day the person who would improve my way of thinking is an Australian. Never in my wildest imagination that one day, my family and I will migrate to Australia.

Worrying is a part of a mum’s life but gradually having a positive mindset improves your coping skills. Pessimism will creep in when you are at your lowest point. It is crucial to be surrounded with people who remind you to stay positive. A person cheering that you will overcome the issue can boost your morale.

Photo by Jessica Bristow

thankful sign

  1. I tried to talk to a STRANGER while waiting.

There was a time when there was no wi-fi or smartphones and all you have to do is wait with other human beings. I tried to strike a conversation while waiting in line at the bus stop, in the hospital, in the restaurant and at school.

I tried to say:

“ What’s the time?”

“ It is so warm today, isn’t it?”

“ Hello, your face looks familiar. Do you live..”

“ Are you a Filipino?” and other conversation starters.  If the person has a short answer then the person is not in the mood to talk. If the person looks you in the eye and says more than you ask for then it’s a good start.

I had different experiences chatting with strangers.

Stranger 1:  The person wanted someone to talk to and was glad to have a company. I had a chat with an old woman on the bus and we were both going to the same hospital.She was battling cancer and she doesn’t know if she will still live the following year. We ended up hugging each other. It was my purpose to be her listening seatmate that day. I wished her well.

Stranger 2: The elderly mum gave advice on how to raise sons. I was waiting for my order and she sat in front of me. She told me it’s her 75th birthday and her son’s 50th birthday on that day and waiting for her salon appointment. She commented, “ Have TIME for your sons. Let them be active in sports so that their minds will not think of silly things.”

Stranger 3: The man told me about buying a house. We were renting that time. I didn’t see that guy anymore but while conversing with him, he made me realize that we had to save money if we decide to give a down payment when purchasing our first home.

Stranger 4: We talked to a stranger in the shops. He and his family became our friends since 2010.

For me, it is not a coincidence meeting random individuals. There is a reason.

Photo by Tobias Zils

people on the street
You’ll never know whom you’re going to meet that will change you.
  1. I tried to LISTEN.

An acquaintance once suggested to me to try to listen to my husband for 10 minutes without interrupting him and see what happens. I am a chatter-box and my husband is a listener. Even when we were dating, he was a man-of-few-words type of guy (or maybe he was just shy to interrupt haha).

After having two sons, I DID. (What?! You might say.)

I set the timer for 10 minutes and I gave my best not to interrupt him. At first, he didn’t know what to say because from the beginning he was the listener. He started telling me things that happened way back in his childhood. I tried to keep my mouth shut. It was hard because I am the type of person reacting within a few minutes in the discussion. After 10 minutes or more, his voice became hoarse due to non-stop talking.

Wow, what a revelation. I learned things about him he didn’t even mention in our first years of being married. Give guys the chance to talk and stop interrupting.Be patient.

Photo by rawpixel.com

woman listening to a man
Note to self: Listen more.
  1. I tried to VOLUNTEER.

It is quite scary for me when I volunteer for a task. However, one good thing I learned when volunteering is it broadens your mind. There are various people you meet whether it is in the church, school or community.

You learn through experience tasks like public speaking, serving other people and communicating with individuals with multi-cultural backgrounds. Volunteering improves your cultural awareness because it makes you see the other side of life that you usually are not exposed to. You understand more other people’s dilemma.

Photo by Alexandr Podvalny

woman and a boy talking
Connecting and reaching out NOT through social media
  1. I tried to pass the driving test.

We didn’t get to the bus stop on time and so the bus left without us. I felt like I was in a Hollywood movie screaming with outstretched arms “ NOOOOOO!” Getting an Australian driver’s license became a major goal for me.

Written exam- done and dusted! On the other hand, the driving test was a nerve-racking experience for me. I failed the first one because I drove 60kph in a 50kph speed limit road and other mistakes which if I was the examiner, I will not give a passing mark to myself.

I failed the second try and I cried while we were leaving the transportation office. The car windows were open and the guy standing on the footpath saw me. Looking back, I saw his reaction seeing me weep. He looked angry while staring at my husband. I guess he could be thinking “You jerk, why are you making the woman cry?”

Passing the driving test on my third try felt like winning the lottery. At last, I have the option not to ride the bus! When the examiner announced I passed the test, I hugged her because I couldn’t contain my joy! After 8 driving lessons and advice from my patient husband, I did it.

Lesson learned: Try and try until you succeed. Yes, it is a cliché but it is so true.

Photo by Alex Harvey

 old woman staring at you
It’s about time you passed that driving test! I thought I would never live to see it.
  1. I tried to study a course.

Trying to study while taking care of a family will test your GRIT as a mum. From what I wrote from my previous blog 10 things to think about before enrolling an online course, studying pushed me to my limits and out of my comfort zone.

Time management and setting priorities were life skills that helped me finish the course. It was not easy but I did it. Cheers to all middle-aged mums out there who are continuously studying and improving their craft. Keep up the good work!

Photo by Stefan Cosma

focus sign

  1. I tried to LOVE.

It has been the common plot of a love story in movies. A guy likes a girl but the girl likes another guy. The guy the girl loves is in love with someone else. It is the same story of unrequited love.

I remembered my classmate. She assumed that our male classmate was courting her because he visited her on weekends. She was so ecstatic telling me that he invited her to his hometown and will be introduced to his parents. To my surprise, the next time we met, she told me in between sobs that he introduced to her his girlfriend during the fiesta.

When you love somebody, it is not a guarantee that you will not get hurt. You will because there is too much emotional investment in it. You become vulnerable and gullible. However, it didn’t hinder me loving someone because it is a risk I had to take.

I am glad I did try to love or else I wouldn’t have three wonderful boys calling me mum.

How about you, my dear reader. Is there something that YOU DO WANT TO TRY? As long as it is not life-threatening or not breaking any laws, what is stopping you?

The question for you is WHY NOT?

 Photo by Martin Shreder

Do what is great sign

 

There is something about crying

crying woman

As a mum, you sometimes catch yourself staring into space, tears kept rolling down your face. You told yourself, I am tired of being strong. This is too much for me. You don’t understand your emotions anymore. Sob. Sob. And more weeping. You are now in the moment when you just feel like CRYING.

There are countless reasons why you are angry, frustrated, sad, anxious and tired. No matter how you try to reason out with yourself with common positive self-talk:

You can get through this.

It is just temporary.

You can overcome this.

Still, after all those affirmations, you end up CRYING.

Alarm bells will be heard around the household when they see their MUM weeping. Every family member is worried. Mum, the multitasker, the tough one that balances home and work, the troubleshooter of all sorts of problems of the family is WEEPING. Oh-uh. Something is terribly wrong. Even a toddler will feel your pain and may even hug you even though the child doesn’t understand what is going on.

It feels good when there is a trusted loved one who is available to comfort you during this time of struggle. However, what if you are alone?  This is when the mums become different. The object that you grab or hold on to while you are crying causes the difference.

When you feel that the issue at hand is beyond your control, you might get:

Box of tissues – Ah, the classic box of tissues which is an alternative to the handkerchief. The latter is an extra part of the laundry but the former is just a throwaway in the bin. Tissues are way better. Blowing your nose until it becomes red, swollen eyelids and red eyes from non-stop crying, tissues are the silent witnesses to your dilemma.

Photo by Jeremy Wong

old lady crying
Why don’t they visit me anymore?

Pillow – The pillow is the partner of the tissues because most of the time, the whining is usually done on the bed. Because no one is there to judge you, the cushion becomes the shock absorber of your tight hugs, punches and screams. Screaming on the pillow is a good free therapy.

Photo by elizabeth lies

woman under the pillows
WHY?!WHY?!WHY?! (screaming curse words)

Comfort food – My last blog discussed FOOD cravings. You might suddenly have the irresistible urge to grab an ice cream, cake, chocolate, salty food, savory food and other junk food that you can shove in your mouth.

Photo by Patrick Fore

Your mind: DO NOT eat DONUTS! You had two already. ( gets another one)

I just hope you feel good afterward. This is also one of the reasons why most middle-age mums are overweight (including me). The food becomes the friend.

Alcoholic drink – For other mums, a drink makes them feel bolder while drowning in their own misery. All I can say is drink responsibly. You need healthy organs.

Remote control – Other mums do not want the silence in the room so they get hold of a remote control to watch something on TV or a movie. Even if the movie is not heavy drama, you still cry because a spoken word or a part of the movie is related to what’s going on in your life.

Photo by Jens Kreuter

Mind-numbing tv marathon while in a bad mood

Smartphone – The smartphone has various uses for the person who has a problem.

 Photo by Rami Al-zayat

smartphone
Tapping the apps.. tap-tap tap-tap
  1. You can cry while listening to your uplifting songs, depressing songs, rock and roll songs, heavy metal or alternative music depending upon your state of mind.
  2. You can have a video chat with someone miles away while crying your heart out.
  3. You can call a trustworthy person who will patiently listen to you or not.
  4. Listen or watch a video on YouTube just to make you feel better.
  5. Listen to a podcast or news just to divert your unhappy mind.

 Sacred item – A mother who is going through a crisis takes a religious item to say a prayer for strength and guidance.  It could be a Bible, a rosary and a prayer book.

Photo by Ben White

Oh God, help me get through this.

 Paper and pen – There are countless swear words you want to say over and over while you are crying but for other mums, they prefer it in written form. They will start writing about their feelings or what they want to say to someone without offending anybody as long as that paper is burned or shredded.

 Photo by Helloquence

Dear Joe, You really bring out the WORST in me. What were you thinking?!!…

I tried this once. I read what I wrote the next day. It gave me a perspective on what was going on in my mind. It was as if I was reading another person’s letter. I made sure no one read it because I burned it.

 A glass of water – You can’t breathe anymore in the middle of your sobs so you seize a glass of water for rehydration. A half an hour of weeping is exhausting and drinking water is a must or else you get dehydrated. After a long session of crying, it feels like you went on a hike.

 Cleaning tools – Crying out of frustration is put to good use by scrubbing away the dirt in the kitchen, the bathroom, the toilet. The good news is after you finished crying, the house is immaculately clean!

Photo by Lucas Pimenta

sad woman near the bathroom sink
So frustrating… at least the bathroom is squeaky clean.

 Knife – Don’t get me wrong. I am talking about cutting the ingredients for cooking. Vent your despair by chopping, mincing and slicing the meat and vegetables on the chopping boards. Good thing, the ingredients don’t have feelings. Moreover, there is already a dinner for the family.

Photo by Mike Petrucci

Crying and cooking at the same time, I salute you.

 Sewing or knitting materials – At the end of your weeping, a creation is made like a blanket or a dress. Your hands were so busy that you didn’t realize you produced a masterpiece. Sometimes, the mind is busy thinking that you stop crying without knowing it.

Pet – The ever loyal pet dog or cat is by your side when no humans are around. Patting their fur while a tsunami of doubts and fears in your mind create a calming effect.

Photo by Jacob Ufkes

dog on the bed
I will stay with you human.

Photo by Chris Abney

pet cat with the owner
Why is my human crying again?

I have nothing against crying. It feels good to release the pent-up emotions. It is challenging being a mum but I wouldn’t exchange my place with someone else’s.

After you STOP CRYING is a game changer because you might be thinking of a plan. What are you going to do afterward? Mums may either:

  1. Do nothing about it because why bother when you cannot change it?
  2. Determined to work things out no matter what and try other options.
  3. Feel you are the victim of the situation and cry repeatedly.
  4. Change the way you think and how you feel about it because life is too short to be miserable.

If you feel that you cry more often than before then I suggest you seek help from a trustworthy family, friend or a psychologist.

Whatever you are going through now, I just hope and pray that you will surpass it and come out of it stronger and wiser. Do not be too hard on yourself. Do not bully yourself by being your worst critic. Cry and move on my dear reader. It is SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALIDOCIOUS to be alive! it just means terrific.

Cravings, Emotions and Filipino Food

Halo-halo

When you have cravings, there are emotions attached to it.

Suddenly craving for an ice cream? Everything fell into place and you want to celebrate!

rainbow ice cream
Happy eating!

Dying to eat chocolate? You just want to shove the piece in your mouth because you are upset.

chocolate waffle
Looks delicious… yes it is.

Angry at someone? You see yourself getting the potato chips in your pantry because you want to release stress.

Feeling bored? There is a bottle of wine somewhere…

There are various reasons why we crave a particular food or drink. I will not discuss alcoholic drinks, coffee or soft drinks.

I want to focus more on FOOD.

CAKE – This is always present on special occasions: birthdays, anniversaries, mother’s day and other special days. In spite of that, when you feel you are an actor in a drama series, the cake is one of the options for stress eating. I could already hear the song “All By Myself”.

ube cake
So happy to see you!

There was one night when I craved for Ube Cake. It is a purple yam cake with macapuno (coconut sport)  in it. Oh, it was one of those nights I couldn’t do anything about it! I do not know how to bake it or if the ingredients are available at the Asian store. I only see it when a talented guest shares this treat in the party.

ICE CREAM – There is something about ice cream that makes you want to eat more. I couldn’t sleep one night and went to the freezer to get two scoops of Rocky Road ice cream. I asked myself, WHY AM I DOING THIS? My mind didn’t even bother to answer and just gave in to temptation.

rocky road ice cream
Eating ice cream with family and another one for midnight snack

What is your tempting ice cream treat? Vanilla? Strawberry? Chocolate? Special flavors like pistachio ice cream perhaps? It even tastes better with an ice cream cone, just like the good old days of childhood. Yum.

CHICKEN – There are two types of chicken I CRAVE: Chickenjoy from the Filipino fast-food chain JOLLIBEE and the spicy chicken from KFC. At the moment, I could not eat chickenjoy here in Australia because it does not have a  Jollibee branch yet. However, I see myself most Tuesdays falling in line at a KFC branch ordering the Cheap Tuesday option.

three boys with Jollibee
We miss you Jollibee especially your chickenjoy.

CHOCOLATE – This is my weakness, is it yours too? There are days I do not even look for it in the pantry or not even eat it for days even if it is just within my grasp. When the craving starts, as if I am a little child coming back to the pantry eating a part bit by bit.

MEAT: BEEF? PORK?  MUTTON? This is not much of a craving for me but other people are craving for these. Do you want it grilled or barbecued? Fried? Baked? Stewed? Eat the jiggly  fats that come with it? Mmmmm…

LECHON
Lechon, where art thou lechon?

POTATO CHIPS – You are not much of a fan of sweet food but you suddenly get uneasy when you crave for something SALTY. Disgust fills your mind when you open the cupboards or the pantry without potato chips. You promised yourself in the grocery store that you will start a healthy life by not buying potato chips. You breathe in and breathe out and close the pantry.

Boy Bawang Cornick
We travel for half an hour just to get one of these!

Stop it. Hold it. I could go on and on with the other food cravings. Don’t make me start with pizza. Let’s go a bit deeper with this. Something familiar.

Furthermore, there is another cause why we desire a particular food: HOMESICKNESS.

–  It was part of your childhood.

–  Father or mother used to cook it for you.

– You associate it with a friend back then.

– It is the food that you devoured during a special occasion in the past.

– Foodstuff that reminds you of home miles and miles away.

Good for you if you can buy it in the shops or the ingredients are available and you can cook it from scratch. Other times, you just have to grin and bear it. Wait for the chance to visit your country of origin and eat it all you want until you can’t take it anymore.

Here are the  Filipino foods that I craved once or twice or more.

Taho – I grew up eating this for breakfast during my childhood years. It is made up of soft tofu with caramel and sago pearls.  Most of the time, the peddler shouted TAHOin front of our house so I asked my grandmother to buy some for me. The answer was always yes. *grinning*

I ate this in front of the house with my childhood friend who was still wearing her pajamas. We didn’t even wash our faces or combed our hair but we were already outside eating taho for breakfast.

Taho
One TAHO for me and one for you

Philippine Mangoes – I already ate different types of mangoes but my heart still craves for Philippine mangoes. Maybe, it is the taste I grew up with or the special memories associated while eating it. Looking back, I always ate mangoes with my loved ones.

Philippine mangoes
I want to eat you all!

Lumpiang sariwa / Fresh spring rolls – The fresh spring rolls prepared by the experts will make you forget your diet. Different vegetables are wrapped in a soft white wrapper then topping it with sweet sauce and peanuts. The secret here why it is so delicious is the sauce that comes with it

one fresh spring roll
The last fresh spring roll… mmm.

Banana cue – This was my afternoon snack growing up. Deep fried bananaplantains with brown sugar are the best! My friends and I devoured it while drinking coconut juice.

two banana cue
Banana cue, when can I eat you again?

Chicharon/ Pork crackling – Dipping this in vinegar and stopping yourself finish the pack is an effort. Hearing the crunch of the pork crackling in every bite and catching up with friends is a match wherever you are.

chicharon/pork crackling
It takes self-discipline to stop eating this.

Balut – fertilized duck egg. Do I have to say more? It is best to eat it with salt or vinegar. It is not for the faint of heart. Legend has it that even the most adventurous, thrill-seeking food lovers have said NO THANK YOU to this.

Balut
I am challenging you to eat BALUT.

Dinuguan – is pork blood stew. I do not know how to cook this but every time I see it in parties, I always taste it initially. When my son first saw me with this, he exclaimed: “ Mum, you are eating dirty food!”   NO, I AM NOT.

Dinuguan
Dinuguan by Nelia

Pandesal – It is a part of breakfast of every Filipino family. You buy it in a bakery early in the morning then fill it with your favorite peanut butter, margarine or cheese. When I was young, the pandesal was bigger. Nowadays, it became smaller and more expensive.

Hot pandesal for breakfast = good start of the day

Leche flan and polvoron – My mother rarely prepared these special treats so when she did, I was in sweets heaven.Leche flan needs 10 egg yolks, condensed milk and evaporated milk. These ingredients are expensive for simple folks. I controlled myself eating the whole serving so I could eat it for days.

3 leche flan
Party Leche flan… I know you want it.

Polvoron is another one. Mama didn’t bother anymore wrapping the treat. She just put it in a big container and gave me a spoon. How I loved eating polvoronwhile watching my favorite cartoons! Be careful eating it or else you might cough and scatter the powder all over the place.

sweet polvoron
Polvoron (right)

Halo-halo – It is a Filipino dessert with shaved ice, evaporated milk, sweet beans and bananas, jelly, leche flan and other ingredients. Halo-halo becomes special because of the other ingredients you decide to mix.

Example, other people put macapuno (coconut sport)  in it or vanilla ice cream on top or jackfruit. It depends upon the preparation and available ingredients. Delicious!

Halo-halo
HALO-HALO: Mix all the ingredients then eat.

Kakanin – Filipino delicacies or rice treats

To prepare these treats, patience is needed because there is a lot of mixing involved. I am still a work in progress in cooking. The last time I made one, it got burnt. I rather eat the food prepared by someone who knows what they are doing. If you are interested to cook Filipino kakanin then here is the website for you.  Click here.

KAKANIN/ RICE CAKES
Examples of KAKANIN/RICE CAKES
sapin-sapin
Sapin-sapin: layer upon layer of sweet sticky food
colorful puto
Colorful puto by Joselito

Tamales or Bobotu to Kapampangans- There is the feeling of anticipation every time I remove the banana leaf wrapper from the tamales. Will the tamales be huge like the wrapper or is it small? My father loves tamales and I love it too.

Tamales wrapped in banana leaves
Surprise! Huge tamales in the house!

Street food – OH YESSS. Air pollution from the public vehicles didn’t stop me from eating street food. I only ate siomai (dim sum dumplings) and quail eggs. I was not adventurous enough to eat the grilled organs of the pig.

street food on a stick
Street food on a stick. Yum!

Pancit Malabon –  Savory noodles with toppings like smoked fish, eggs and sea food ( shrimp, oysters, mussels)

Pancit Malabon
A plate of this and you are good to go!

Reno – It is a canned good of liver spread. Yes, we do love this and we put it in Caldereta or Beef stew.

Reno, you will always be special.

To sum it up, there will always be a time that you start to crave for something. Sometimes it is okay to give in to the temptation. Just have the discipline to STOP yourself when you know enough is enough.  My enough is when my belt needs to get loose. *giggling*

A friend once  told me ”  JUST BUY A BIGGER T-SHIRT  if you don’t fit in it anymore.” Funny yes. In the long run, it will not be.

There you have it, folks. At the moment, I am craving for BALUT.  How about you? What are you craving for?

Just Dance 2016

guy dancing on the street

The boys excitedly handed out a  second-hand Just Dance 2016 game to me one Sunday afternoon. We tried to play the game out of curiosity. As a mother, here are my ten thoughts about the game.

  1. It is a game that hit me with the reality about the status of my weight.

I love to dance but the moves made me feel my toned fats were too heavy. I was trying to catch my breath after a more than 3-minute song! It was the day I discovered how badly I needed to lose weight. Talking about an in denial mum!

Photo by Carlos Bretón

bear
It is time to take a stand and LOSE THIS BELLY FAT!
  1. It gave me the opportunity to play a game with the boys.

I have driven for years but the boys kept giving me advice on how to drive in a Mario Kart game.

“Keep your hands still mummy.” Of course, I always fall off the cliff in that game!

Just Dance gave me the chance to shine and receive my 3 or 4 or 5 stars just following the dance steps! I no longer hear the bits of wisdom coming from the boys this time.

  1. It is an alternative to gym exercise.

It takes dedication to go to the gym, run on the treadmill and use the gym equipment until the muscles hurt.  I had the option to sweat at the comfort of my home with Just Dance video game. Fit and healthy me soon! Fingers crossed.

  1. Learning the modern dance moves made me feel young.

It really looks cool doing those moves. So this is the kind of dance they are doing now! So what if I am doing it wrong? Dancing with the boys rubbed in me their youthful energy.

  1. I discovered new songs I like to dance to.  

Gibberish by Max

Animals by Martin Garrix

Blame by Calvin Harris featuring John Newman

I can still appreciate songs of today. My playlist is not limited anymore to the songs of my generation.

  1. It is a game that makes the boys move and dance.

I try to limit the video game time of the boys. I just see them sit around staring at the monitor or television. With this game, it is like inserting exercise in their schedule!

  1. I felt good after dancing the playlist.

I could have eaten a brownie or devouring my favorite chips. NO. I used my 30 minutes to dance. It was the right decision.Raising my heartbeat and sweating away my fats felt sensational.

Based on my experience, you must have a dance buddy to push you to dance and exercise or else, excuses will start rolling in.

  1. It is another way to do family bonding time.

Weekends come by so fast. One way of spending quality time indoors is to play this game.  It was fun teasing or challenging the boys to dance a particular song we know the steps are suited for girls. My son remarked “Seriously!” after dancing to Born this Way by Lady Gaga.

Furthermore, you will encounter songs that are easy or difficult to dance with. The good news is if you keep on dancing the same song over and over with family, you will get used to it even if you have two left feet. Watching ourselves and laughing about it is time well spent.

Photo by Simon Noh 

sign: NO MUSIC,NO LIFE.

  1. We could sing while waiting for our turn to dance.

While the song is playing, the lyrics are shown at the bottom left corner of the screen.  When we are not sure what the word we heard was, we just look at the lyrics and sing our hearts out.

  1. The little technophobe in me is gradually slipping away.

Oh sure, just press x or the circle then go up.  Trying to learn how to turn on and off and reading the options was a bit too much for me. Learning how to manipulate technology is one step away from feeling obsolete.

 

My family gave me Just Dance 2017 for my birthday. Hopefully, I could dance away the food I ate during winter time. Spring is here and it is time for new beginnings and new YOU! Are you with me?

 

Multicultural Dinner at Alexandra Hills (Redlands): A Mouth-watering Experience

LECHON

One of the things that get me excited is FREE FOOD!I have been eating free food every year since 2011.  It all started 26th February 2011 at the hall of St. Anthony’s Catholic Parish. The parish priest Father Emmanuel Aguiyi and parishioners started to organize a multicultural dinner.

It created an opportunity for all the church goers and their friends to cook and introduce their national dish for all the attendees to try. It was a huge success and it became a part of the social activity of the parish every year.

two cute boys attending a Multicultural Dinner
First Multicultural Dinner
26 February 2011

Recently, my friends and I attended the multicultural dinner that was held at the Hall of  St. Anthony’s Catholic Primary School. More than 20 flags of different countries were represented.

multicultural dinner invitation
Facebook page of the parish

As usual, the wait was killing me because I was so excited to taste what the participants had to offer! I am a food lover at heart. My share for the night was pastillas de leche.

daysofmum.com pastillas photo
my sweet pastillas ( Philippines )

I asked for permission from the early comers to take a photo of the food they brought. Some brought a savory dish while others chose sweets. My apologies for not being able to take photos of ALL the food.  I was busy tasting and coming back for seconds to the food I discovered to be really good! Sad to say, the other dishes I wanted to try were gone in minutes because they were a huge hit! I hope next time, I will have the chance to eat it!

In no particular order, here are the photos of the diverse cuisine I took before I started stuffing my mouth with food I cannot even spell or pronounce.

Maltese Bread Pudding
Maltese Bread Pudding ( Malta) 

According to Sylvia, Maltese Bread Pudding is a mixture of bread, eggs,  flour, butter, nuts and other ingredients.

Chicken Rendang
Chicken Rendang ( Malaysia)

According to Felicia, Chicken Rendang is chicken with coconut milk, toasted desiccated coconut and a paste of mixed spices ( ginger, galangal, turmeric leaves, lemon grass, garlic and shallots).

Pastiso
Pastitsio ( Greece)

According to Anna, Pastitsio‘s main ingredients are macaroni, minced meat and white sauce.

Tiramisu
Tiramisu ( Italy)

According to Annita, Tiramisu has cream and cake in it. It is alcohol and coffee flavored.

Sri Lankan cuisine
Sri Lankan cuisine

According to Jennifer, she prepared Vegetable rice, Spicy Yellow rice ( right) and Chicken curry.

Indian food
Indian food

The food nearest to the flag is Mutton Gravy ( Goat meat ) while the food with eggs on top is Biryani.

Here are the other photos.  I could not comment on the food because either the person that made it was not available to be interviewed or the program was about to start.

Pavlova
Pavlova and other sweets ( Australia)
Muesli ( Australia)
 Gyoza - Japanese dumplings
Gyoza ( Japan)
sweet food from Brazil ( don’t know the name )
dessert from Portugal
chocolate dessert ( Portugal)

Furthermore, my friends are excellent cooks! Here are the photos of the Filipino cuisine.  The church goers’ table representing the Philippines was loaded with food you definitely want to try. Believe me. I wasn’t able to take a photo of ADOBO but it was a hit as well.

The food that many people took photos of is LECHON… ( roasted pig )

LECHON
Lechon ( Philippines ) by Eddie
Pork Barbecue by Nikki
Sisig by Ronald ( almost gone )
Pan de Coco by Gina
Dinuguan
Dinuguan by Nelia
Puto by Fernan ( The partner of Puto is Dinuguan.)
Maja Blanca
Maja Blanca by Dulce
Pork and Prawn Spring Rolls by Pete

I just want to make something clear about the multicultural dinner. It is not a guarantee that the food you see in this blog will be served each year.

Every year, the cooks prepare a different dish. Similarly, one family could be absent. We will miss their presence and their mouth-watering dish.  I prepared pastillas this year because one of the ingredients of cassava cake (my share for many years ) was out of stock.

Everybody had a marvelous time. It was a chance to catch up with friends while dining. Moreover, there was entertainment after the feast. There were live performances from theatre-like singing to cultural dances, singing in their own language to guitar playing. I was able to capture only 3 performances. I needed to drink tea and get some fresh air outside. Inhale.. Exhale…

singing teens
impressive voices
cultural dance
cultural dance
Filipino girls singing
singing Filipino and English songs 

The event was well-attended. Kudos to the organizers of the multicultural dinner! Thank you to all the participants that brought delicious food.

Also, thank you to all that helped set up the hall before hand and the clean-up after the dinner.

Please do not be absent next year. Share your national dish with us. Everyone is welcome.

lady with lechon
See you next year!

15 Sneaky Reasons why we buy things we don’t need and their Solutions

shopping

Are you one of those individuals that buy something you do not need? I have a list of 15 tricky reasons and noteworthy solutions. Be aware of it.  You might be in denial at the moment. Awareness is the first step to finding a solution.

  1. It is on sale or better yet is half-price!

This is my weakness. When I see an item that is on sale, I feel my hands have a mind of their own. My weak right hand ( not really)  reaches out for the item which at that moment I do not even need.

Example: half-priced chocolate

I tried to ignore the chocolates and came home empty-handed. After dinner, I had a craving. I opened the pantry and lo and behold, no chocolates!  I opened the can of Milo and ate one spoonful of it. To my dismay, the boys saw me and I unintentionally introduced them to the path of eating a spoonful of powdered Milo. Guilty as charged! (Mugshot front view, mugshot side view). What have I done!

If you are not a chocolate lover, maybe your weakness is:

Photo by Jeremy Wong

SHOES! Are you pumped up?!

a. half-priced shoes?

b. on sale bags?

c. slashed prices of clothes?

d. super cheap home decor?

e. all of the above?

I am truly excited for you if you have found a bargain you need. However, if you have tons of clothes in the wardrobe still with tag prices, piles of shoes almost not worn at all, branded bags in the cabinet only used twice a year, then ask yourself, do you need it now?

Solution: “Do you really need it?” Your mind says “Yes! Yes!”  Bring along a disciplined and logical friend with you so he/she can stop you from what you’re going to do. Avoid junk mail and online updates of sales at all costs. If you can.

Photo by Evelyn Mostrom

I got your back, my friend.
  1. You don’t feel good.

Have you experienced those days when the moment you wake up, everything was set to make you have a bad mood? It is mid-day and your mind was racing with the idea “Oh, I hope this day ends soon.”  The day is over and you feel lousy. The shops are still open. Ha! You were just telling yourself, “I will just look around.” Nope. Before you went home, you bought something. It felt good, right? After a few days, you convince yourself, why did I buy that?

Solution: Be mindful of what you are doing when it’s a rotten day. What is your option that will make you feel good that is free and will not bust your budget? When the day is awful, I talk to a trustworthy loved one who is willing to listen to my dramas.

Photo by Kris Atomic

Guess what happened next sis? It will blow your mind …blah blah
  1. You are bored.

You do not want to stay home so you made up your mind to go window-shopping. Oh, the shopping center is begging you to come in and look around! Suddenly, your eyes fancy that item which for the sake of buying, you buy it. The promise of just window-shopping was thrown out of the window. The end

Solution: Stay at home if you do not have a goal or list of important things to buy. Sometimes,  I already have a list and yet still end up buying items, not on the list. What more if you do not have an objective for being there? Bored? What can you do for free at home?besides the shopping center? I watch movies/episodes and eat popcorn with the family.

Watching DRAGON BALL SUPER with the boys ( episodes you have to wait weekly)

 

  1. You are competitive.

Did you see the latest branded bag of the friend of a friend? Your chest quickly felt a pang of envy while observing her bag in a party. You whispered to yourself “I can afford that too.”  On you go to the Direct Factory Outlet of the brand you desperately want to have.

Envy is such a negative feeling to have. I met people having credit card problems because of all the shoes, bags and clothes they bought all in the name of keeping up with their so-called friends.

Solution: If the feeling of envy is your trigger, you will never be happy. Release it. There is freedom to it.

  1. You want it because it is interesting.

The item is so cute. The product will be an excellent collection of yours. It will be a hot topic of your party. Only you have it among friends and acquaintances. It is a unique item to behold for many years to come (what you believe) or just days to be realistic. After a month, it will start to collect dust or will be stored in a container to be forgotten.

Photo by Kukuh Himawan Samudro

store with different items
I got to have this! It is so cute!

Solution: I know the feeling of happiness for buying it but is it worth it when it is time to see your credit card bill? For me, a novelty item is valuable if you use it every day.

  1. You buy it out of curiosity.

Food lovers will relate to this. You are not that hungry but you saw a particular food that made you curious what could be its taste. As if the food is tempting you, “ Buy me, taste me, know what I taste like.”  After 5 minutes of swallowing your saliva while staring at the food, you buy it. Good for you if you discovered food worth eating again and again. Good luck when your verdict is never again will I buy this!

Photo by Mink Mingle

Mmmm.. That looks interesting to eat.

Solution:  Do not go to the shopping center hungry. Have your meals or snacks at home and then go shopping. Otherwise, you will spend more money with food than what you actually planned to. I am a food lover and to all food lovers out there, we can do this!

  1. You feel you deserve a reward.

You have worked hard for quite some time now.  Your quick eye saw the item and decided then and there, you deserve to be compensated with all the sacrifices you have done. Even if it is not on the budget, you purchase it. Even if you are spending money way beyond what you have, you still do it because you feel you need a gift for yourself.

Photo by Jakub Gorajek

YEAH! Traveling around the world! Wow, driving our brand new car!
After 2 years: UH, OH.

Solution:  It is so much rewarding when the gift to yourself will not give you sleepless nights and anxiety throughout the year. Choose a present that will give you joy, not temporary thrill. Live within your means.

  1. You are addicted to purchasing items.

Do you have that uncontrollable urge that you have to buy something no matter what?  Do you have the overwhelming desire to click online purchases or tap on your reliable smartphone items you do not necessarily need at the time? The items you are scanning are not priorities of your budget.

Photo by Luke Porter

OMG! It is so cheap! I must have it now!

Solution: Better get some help (personal and professional) from a sensible person or else you will end up in a huge pile of debt.

  1. You were deprived of the item in your childhood.

Parents who grew up in a deprived childhood will relate to this. Growing up poor, you didn’t experience the luxuries of life. Fast forward to the present and you have a family now. Your child wants a toy which triggered your emotions about your own childhood.  The toy is not in the family budget but still, you see yourself paying for it at the cashier.

Photo by Darren Bockman

toy train
I didn’t have that toy when I was young.

Solution: There is power with the word No especially with children. As a parent, I choose my battles. There were times I said yes and there were times I said no.  My son once stated, “Mum, when you say I will think about it, it means no.”  He knows me well.

  1. You want to be popular or a show-off.

Some people want to be popular and be topics of conversations. It is part of their need as an individual to bask in their glory, to be in the spotlight and display the item as their status symbol. I am happy for them if they can afford it.

Photo by NeONBRAND

man with a bike
Looking cool with my awesome bike

Solution:  Do not take the risk of going beyond what you can afford just for fame’s sake. There will always be new acquaintances who can buy better stuff than you.  Self-respect will remain popular across cultures.

  1. A friend, acquaintance or a store assistant convinced you to buy it.

Based on my experience, I do not know why the staff at the grocery store approaches me first and offers me a free taste of the food they are selling. Maybe, I have the aura of I-will-buy-anything-just-let-me-taste-it-first type of person. There are other people in the store but almost always, they approach or talk to me first rather than the other humans roaming around.

The boys had a free taste too and they always answered “Yes, we like it. Let’s buy it.” The case is closed. Give me what you are selling.

Conversations with friends and acquaintances can also trigger you buying their highly recommended purchases. They might need it in their lives but do you need it too?

Solution: Just say “ No, thank you” and move on.

  1. You got hooked on a tv ad or infomercial.

The power of sales talk conquered your views from a bystander to a buyer. Even at the comfort of your home, you might start calling on the phone and order the items from the infomercials or tv ads.

Even my sons were persuaded by it. “Mum, look at this! Buy it and you will have flat and toned abs!”

Good for you if you discovered an item that will help you in your everyday life or even your health issues. However, if it is not what you need, it might just end up still inside the package box and stored somewhere in a corner.

Solution: If you are that type of person that cannot control himself/herself buying on the spot without thinking of the consequences, turn off the tv or smart phone and do something productive to divert your thinking.

  1. You got so much extra money.

Spend. Spend.Spend. The debit card is having a workout.

Photo by Heidi Sandstrom.

shopping
So much shopping to do!

Solution: Please give me your money. I will spend it with the things I need.  Kidding aside, donating to charity or setting up a foundation to assist the less fortunate is money working for the common good.

  1. You love to hoard things.

Are you that kind of person who keeps buying things because you believe that you will need the items someday? The loved ones living with you are fed up with the things you keep buying. You don’t need them yet so you stock them somewhere you will soon forget and boxes occupy most of your home space. Good luck looking for it when you need it.

During the peak of popularity of garage sales for me way back in 2010-2011, I was a hoarder and loved buying cheap second-hand goods. I ended up having more than what I bargained for – lots of clutter.

Photo by Clem Onojeghuo

different boxes
Where did I put that item I bought? Hmm

Solution: STOP buying it. Remove the mess.  I am a work in progress with removing the clutter but I am getting there… soon or maybe in a distant future. It felt good to see more space at home. True story!

  1. You want someone you love to be happy.

“Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.” –Thomas Dewar

You know deep inside, when you buy that particular item, the person you love will be ecstatic or delighted to have it at long last. Even if you don’t need it, you will sacrifice your own needs and wants and grab the item and pay before you change your mind!

Buying an expensive but reasonable gift for someone you love is great on rare occasions and within your means. Still, it is not a guarantee that the person will appreciate it.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez

man and woman sitting on the grass
Having a belly laugh together is time well spent.

Solution: There are other ways of proving your love. The best one is giving your precious time and undivided attention to loved ones.  In addition, show love by helping with the laundry, doing the dishes, hugs, kisses, eating home-cooked meals at picnics and not looking at updates on your phone constantly while talking to them are my suggestions.

 

To sum up, if you become aware of your personal trigger, then you begin to be conscious of your actions, possibly get help or control your desire. We all purchase things for all the wrong reasons. My intention for you, my dear reader, is to take charge of your emotions and your purchases. We can handle it.

I now live on a road where they don’t deliver junk mail. Hence, no temptations for me this time.

Photo by Martin Sattler

man with a flashlight
A way will be made.

 

Alternatively, what are your own solutions that made you buy only what you need?

Leave a comment below. I love to learn from my readers.

Share this article with someone you know who loves to go shopping.

 

 

 

20 Acronyms my sons asked me

Have you encountered an acronym that made you ask yourself “What does it stand for?” It becomes frustrating when my sons asked me the meanings of the acronyms and I just cannot remember! Therefore, I surfed the internet just to satisfy their curiosity and to maintain my peace of mind.  Here are my 20 answers to their most pressing questions in no particular order.

Wifi – Turn on the wifi, please!

Meaning: Wireless Fidelity in the 1990s but officially it has no meaning at present. However, the meaning wireless fidelity is still being widely used.

USB – “Mum, have you seen my USB?”  It is an acronym that made me say          “Where did you last put it?” lots of times in the past.

Meaning: Universal Serial Bus

QANTAS – When I was young, my father told me the meaning of QANTAS twice because he loves to read his encyclopedia. I tried to recall what my father said but I forgot when my sons inquired about it. It never occurred in my wildest dreams that one day my family and I will book this airline and live in Australia. Mindblown!

Meaning: Queensland and Northern Territory Aerial Services Limited

TNT – Have you watched the funny cartoons featuring Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote? Wile E. Coyote often used TNT to catch Road Runner.

Meaning: Trinitrotoluene

NASA – Every time we watch a science-fiction movie, the boys always make me say the meaning of this acronym. I already know it by heart for a long time.

Meaning: National Aeronautics and Space Administration

am / pm – What is the time? 6 am or 6 pm? I surfed the internet just to make sure the spelling is right.

Meaning:  am  ante meridiem  (before noon)

pm  post meridiem   (after noon)

idk – I giggled after I discovered the meaning of this.

Meaning: I don’t know.

RSVP – Most people know the meaning of this in English but how about the spelling in French?

Meaning: répondez s’il vous plaît  ( Please respond.)

TBA – I often encounter this in rosters and meetings.

Meaning: To be announced

P. S. – I seldom use this but when I wrote a note for my son, he asked me what it was. Youngsters nowadays seldom post letters by snail mail for this acronym to be utilized. I belong to the generation who wrote letters with lots of P.S. in it.

Meaning: Postscript

Kmart photo
To shop or not to shop

K-Mart – My sons and I often visit this store but what does the K mean?

Meaning: Kresge

Big W sign
shopping and window shopping

Big W – After the K we need to look for the W. It is another store we love to shop and window shop.

Meaning: Woolworths

SPAM canned goods
It is time for hoarding.=)

SPAM – I immediately buy Spam when it is half price.

Meaning: Spiced Ham or Shoulder of Pork and Ham

M & Ms – When I was young, it was definitely a treat to eat one of these.

Meaning: Mars and Murrie

M & M's bars
To buy or not to buy

EFTPOS – We saw the sign EFTPOS not available which made us say “ What’s that acronym?”

Meaning: electronic funds transfer point of sale

CVV – This is the three or four digit number depending upon the credit or debit card you have.

Meaning: Card Verification Value

AMF – Every time we pass this place we go bowling to, my boys always nag me what does AMF stand for? After around 5 times of inquiring, I finally searched the meaning of it.

Meaning: American Machine and Foundry

party giveaways from AMF bowling
party giveaways from AMF bowling

SIRI– Hey, Siri!

Meaning: Speech Interpretation and Recognition Interface

XXXX – We watched the third game of State of Origin and my second son inquired about it.

Meaning: You read it as Four X. There is no meaning to it. It is a brand of Australian beer.

GIF – Some gifs are really funny.

Meaning: Graphic Interchange Format

There will be new acronyms in the future that my boys will want to know but that will be written in another blog.

 

What acronyms made you ask yourself ” What does that stand for?”  Please leave a comment so I could learn from my readers.

Share this if it made you think ” So that’s what it means!”

 

 

 

Dirty Laundry Lessons

Ah, this is the life! Dirty laundry in the hamper is waiting for me. It is inevitable and time-consuming. It is a chore that makes you say “ This will never end!” It’s a lifetime task. Let me share the lessons I learned with my dirty laundry.

  1. It is a never-ending cycle.

I feel accomplished when I look at an empty hamper. All the washing is done. However, the feel-good moment is just fleeting. When the children come home from school,  fresh supply of dirty uniforms particularly smelly socks are dumped in the hamper. Inhale.. exhale. It’s a part of life. Endurance is a virtue being perfected here.

laundry basket
The second basket was done! 5,000 more baskets to go!
  1. Doing the laundry is exercise.

Machine wash or hand wash, check! Carry the hampers outside the backyard, check! Hang the clothes to dry, check! When the clothes are dry, get them for folding, check!This is hard work. I am burning calories!

  1. The missing sock will remain a mystery.

 I collected more than 10 socks with missing pairs. Is the washing machine taking it? Is there a sock fairy who gets them from the clothesline for fun? My friend suggested buying a dozen pairs of socks with only one color. That way, I will never have the issue of looking for its pair.  The tip helped me.

jeans on the clothesline
Job: The pocket checker
  1. The pockets should always be checked.

Have you experienced getting the clothes out of the washing machine just to see tiny white pieces of tissue stuck on the clothes? To my horror, I traced it to the pockets of the jeans. It was a moment for me to keep calm and control the Hulk Mum.

Have you experienced discovering coins or paper money hidden in the pockets? It makes you feel rich, right?

  1. Vinegar can remove stains on white garments.

Red stains were on 3 white inner shirts. The culprit was a small red face towel accidentally thrown with the pile. My husband remembered the advice of my mother-in-law. Soak the white clothes in water with vinegar. After two days, he showed to me the red stains were gone.

For me, flowers are good but helping with the laundry is better. www.daysofmum.com

  1. Helping with the laundry = LOVE.

It is really a big deal when a loved one helps with the laundry. The burden is lessened.  For me, flowers are good but assisting me with the laundry is better.

  1. Families who have excellent house helpers are lucky.

Once upon a time, I had the privilege to have a house help. I didn’t bother back then about the hand washing, bleaching and separating the white from the colored clothes. Washing clothes for a family every week is NOT an easy task. Having an amazing trustworthy house help for years is truly a blessing.

  1. Appreciate the clothes you have.

Clothes are basic needs of man and yet some are deprived of it.  When I see the hamper piling up with dirty laundry, I tell myself, “ Don’t complain. Be thankful you have clothes.”

  1. There is always a surprise lurking on the clothes.

Before washing: What is this I see? A sticky, smelly substance … eww. Enough said. Hand washing is a must.

After washing: What is this I see? Bird poop?! Wiping it off was useless. I have to wash it again!

clothes and bedsheets hanging on the clothesline
Wait a minute… Oh no!
  1. Check the clothesline for maintenance.

I was proud of myself finishing the washing. Then suddenly, all the clothes fell down on the muddy ground. I wanted to scream! The event was the epitome of frustration!Repeating the washing was an idea my brain couldn’t handle. With a sad face, I picked up the clothes to do the task, again.

  1. It instills responsibility with the children.

Put the dirty garments in the correct laundry basket. Help mum by carrying the hampers in the backyard. Assist mum in folding the clothes.

I told my boys “ I am not your slave. I am your mother.” 

One good thing about the boys helping me fold the clothes is they start discussing topics which most of the time made me laugh.

  1. When in doubt, hang the clothes to dry in a shaded area.

The forecast is sunny, it suddenly rains. I am miles away from home. At the back of my mind, I was thinking about the clothes.  It was annoying.

Are you too tired coming home from work? Hang the garments under a covered area. The clothes will dry by themselves, rain or shine, winter or not, you forgot them or not.  The only issue here is the odor of the clothes. Solution: Invest in sweet-smelling fabric conditioner. If you have extra money, have a clothes dryer.

 

What lessons have you learned with your laundry?