My previous blog post 13 reasons why the person didn’t answer your greeting got a lot of readers on my website. I noticed that most of the visitors searched for this query: what to do when the person didn’t answer your greeting. Here is a list of 10 options on what to do when the person didn’t answer back.
- Act as if nothing happened. I chuckle.
It feels awkward when you enthusiastically greeted the person but the man/woman didn’t even notice you. Before, I beat myself thinking why oh why the person didn’t even acknowledge me.
Is he/she angry with me?
Does the person dislike me?
Did I do something bad?
Then, I realized why am I making myself miserable? Whatever the person’s reason is, don’t make a big deal out of it. Breathe. Don’t overthink. Move on. Sometimes, it is not about you. It is about them. Please read my 13 reasons why blog post if you want to learn the answers about them.
I just greeted someone “Good morning!” a few days ago and she didn’t even bother looking. Other people heard me and looked at my direction. For a few seconds, I felt it was an epic fail moment. Then, I chuckled to myself and the thoughts in my head were “Wow, I feel like I am in a comedy movie experiencing a cringe-worthy moment. Oh well.”
Shake it off and go on your way.
- If there is another individual near the person you want to greet, divert your attention to that person.
I was trying to greet a particular person but I wasn’t noticed. The individual beside him/her did. Don’t waste your friendly greeting. SMILE. Give it to someone else who will appreciate it. Maybe, there is a reason your target individual didn’t hear you. You are being redirected to someone whom you are destined to meet.
Based on my experience, the person I chose to divert my attention to DID NEED A PERSON TO TALK TO. I listened to her and it made her feel good afterward. She felt relieved.
- If the person is the one you really want to start a conversation with, repeat your greeting.
As the saying goes, try and try until you succeed. Repeated calls are bound to get the person’s attention. Take the hint if the person is deliberately avoiding you. Observe the person’s body language. Give him/her the space he/she needs. There are other opportunities – place and time to start a conversation.
Photo by Adam Solomon
- If your greetings are constantly being ignored most of the time, it is time to reflect the reason. Is it you?
Answer this question: How can you deliver a better greeting next time?
- Is it your voice – volume and the tone?
- Is it your attitude when you start a conversation? Are you a ray of sunshine or the bearer of catastrophic news?
- Are you a forgettable person? Maybe it is time to read books about How to improve your social skills.
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Accept the moment as a learning opportunity.
You are not alone in experiencing this. It happens. Accept it as a learning experience on how to become a better person in greeting someone.
- Approach the person.
It is a must to discuss an important issue with this fellow now. It could no longer wait for another day. If that is the case, approach the person at arm’s length and greet him/her again. Look at him/her in the eye and have an enthusiastic friendly greeting. Maybe the person is having a rough day and he/she needs a person who will lift UP his/her spirits. Starting a conversation on a positive note is better.
- Call the person.
The day is almost over and you still cannot get rid of the frustrated feeling of not being acknowledged by the person you were excited to greet. If the person is a close family or friend then call.
Be careful with your words. Start it with “Hello! How are you? I saw you this morning and said hello but I think you were busy at that time.”
Most of the time, the person will answer, “Sorry, I didn’t notice you. I was ______.” From their reason, you will have a customized answer why oh why they didn’t answer back.
The good thing about this method is you were able to express your thoughts, you will know the reason and there is no guesswork about the status of your relationship. Example: Is he/she angry with me? Do this method only to people close to you like a relative or friend.
- Make it a conversation starter the next time you meet the person.
You are not comfortable expressing your thoughts through calls or texts. This option is a better one for you – conversation face to face.
You: “I saw you yesterday and said hello but I think you were busy at that moment.”
Having a personal conversation will give you a vantage point because you can personally hear the tone of the voice, see their body language and understand the words that go with the gestures.
You will be more aware of his/her side of the story and the other person will know what you felt. If there will be a next time, he/she will be more alert and you will have an open mind about the reasons why other people don’t greet back. This method will liberate you from cycles of overthinking.
Photo by Nathan Dumlao
- Relax.
Does it truly matter? Will it matter 5 years from now?
- Manage your thoughts.
Refrain from entertaining thoughts of self-pity. It will be okay. As the song goes “Don’t worry. Be happy.”
Based on my experience, I could no longer count the number of times in my life when my greetings were absorbed by the wind. As a middle-aged mum, I learned how to giggle and greet myself instead in the process (not too loud though or else people will think you are going crazy).
Me: “Good morning Shirin, It is a lovely day today.”
My dear reader, if the other person did answer your greeting, isn’t it wonderful that you reached out to another person today? A friendly greeting with a smile is all it takes to connect and start the day or even end the day with joy.
